I Can't Stand My Boss and My Co-Worker (I am my boss and my only co-worker).
A dramatic retelling of taking a week off.
The curated fall atmosphere I’ve created in my apartment has finally made its way outdoors. I can once again wear my favorite Madewell cashmere sweater on my morning walk along the Hoboken waterfront and light my apple cinnamon candle when I get home without feeling obnoxious. I love any change of season because it feels like an intentional reset—and after traveling throughout the entirety of the spring and summer, a reset was just what I needed.
For the first time in over four years, I took a true week off. Working for myself creates the dichotomy of freedom. Do I have a flexible schedule or am I always working? Making content around my own lifestyle means that everything from cleaning my apartment to traveling with my sister can and in my opinion, technically should be an opportunity to pull my phone out and document it. I feel so lucky to have my current dream job as a writer and content creator. I consciously try not to take the privilege for granted.
For some background, I started my current content creator role four years ago when I was still working a traditional corporate job in media. I would hit the streets of NYC at 7 am, tripod in hand, to shoot content before the workday started. I then transitioned to a role working 30-hours a week as a writer at StyleCaster which also allowed me more time to focus on my social content. And finally, I went freelance this past January—I now have the pleasure of writing for a variety of editorial platforms and filming content on my own schedule.
I love being my own boss but I sometimes question if I’m fit for the position. I’m highly critical, always justify overtime, and constantly compare myself to others in the same role. The boundary that may typically exist between work and personal life is non-existent and I often miss the camaraderie that carries a team.
My only consistent co-worker is my own reflection on my phone screen—and just like with any co-worker, I eventually got a little sick of her! Every time I set my camera up to film, I ended up nitpicking my appearance and ideas, and doom-scrolling through Instagram to see an endless highlight of people “doing more and better” than me.
All of this to say, I realized that I needed a week off. Over the past week, I gave into my lazy girl fantasies and did nothing. And in my typical effort to make something productive out of it, I’m sharing this post with you as a recap:
I didn’t take any photos or videos of myself (I swear I look prettier now than I did a week ago)
I wore the same Daily Drills sweatpants every day (and I’m still wearing them now)
I watched all of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives (overhyped but still entertaining)
I watched all of Emily in Paris Season 4 (why didn’t they wear helmets skiing?)
I read Golden Girls by Elin Hildebrand (I love a beach read)
I bought banana pudding from Magnolia Bakery and ate it on the couch (and I’ll do it again)
I walked about 10 miles a day (and was frequently joined by my friend Bella)
I went to bed at 1am and slept until 10am (it’s like I’m 17 again!)
I indulged my cat’s obsession with running down my apartment building hallways (he wears a leash)
And for the grande finale, I cleaned out my closet (*angels sing)
If I’m being honest, I felt pretty guilty about my week off while it was happening. I think the guilt stemmed from feeling unworthy of a break because I have a glamorized job and thinking a week without posting would catapult me into irrelevant obscurity.
Now that the week has come to a close, I realize that it wasn’t such a big deal. You probably didn’t even notice that I was offline! Regardless, I’m back now and have lots of exciting things coming up! I am excited to share most of them with you :)